The Fighters

place: Boston

time: now

CHARACTERS:

BEN

FAYE

CRISSY

KATIE

ANNOUNCER


Lights on Ben and Faye. Ben is pacing around in the back waiting room. He is trying to motivate his fighter, Faye.

BEN

All right, girl, this is it. You’ve got a title fight and a shot at being a big star. Do you think you can handle this?

FAYE

Of course. I took out Million Dollar Baby, Micky Ward, and half the Bruins. I am ready to fight.

Lights up on Crissy and Katie.

CRISSY

Are you ready? It’s a dog eat dog world out there, and no one is going to let a loss go unnoticed.

KATIE

I don’t know if I can do this.

CRISSY

What? Pshaw. It’s just Faye.

KATIE

Faye who has beaten all the major fighters over the last few years.

CRISSY

Yes, she’s a top fighter. But Miss Faye is getting old. She’s no spring chicken when it comes to boxing.

Lights off Crissy and Katie, lights on Ben and Faye.

BEN

I bet they’re talking about how old you are right now. They’ll say anything to get Katie to be confident.

FAYE

But what if I am too old?

BEN

Nonsense. You’re not old, you’re seasoned. I know that you’ve been at this since you were five, and that you’ve taken a lot of hits over the years, but no one is going to stop you from reaching your full potential.

FAYE

Yeah, I am seasoned. I’m a veteran. She’s barely been boxing. For Pete’s sake, if that girl thinks she can beat me, then she’s got another thing coming!

Lights off Ben and Faye, lights on Crissy and Katie.

KATIE

I bet they’re talking about how young I am.

CRISSY

Well that’s true, you are relatively inexperienced. But it’s not just about years, it’s about hours. Think about how many times you’ve been in the gym, how many miles you’ve run for your roadwork, how many weights you’ve lifted! You’re unstoppable!

Lights off Crissy and Katie, lights on Ben and Faye.

BEN

You’re going to crush her. Let’s get out there and make it rain!

They exit to the auditorium. Both boxers enter to loud music.

BEN

(announces) Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, fish and fowl, please give it up for the one and only, the four time Norwood High School champion, the great and powerful, Faye Wellington!

The crowd goes wild. Faye walks down the aisle and into the ring, revving up the crowd as she goes.

CRISSY

(announces) Who here is ready for some boxing??? Here she comes, the fierce, the fabulous, the fighter with the most knock outs of her generation, Miss Katie O’Reilly!

Katie walks down the aisle and goes into the ring, also trying to rev up the crowd. The two girls meet in the ring. They circle each other and throw taunts.

FAYE

I hope you enjoy losing, Katie, because that’s what’s about to happen.

KATIE

You can’t get into my head, Miss Faye. Not no way, not no how.

ANNOUNCER

Ladies and gentlemen, let the world champion boxing match begin!

The Wii machine lights up, and the girls pick up their white controllers. Suddenly, the arena goes dark.

KATIE

What’s happening?

FAYE

Hey, I wanna box!

ANNOUNCER

(shouting) Ladies and gentlemen, it appears that the electricity has gone out.

CRISSY

Well, someone had better get it back on again, because we came here to fight.

BEN

Yeah, we are not leaving here until these girls have pummeled each other and only one is left virtually standing.

ANNOUNCER

(shouting) Could everyone in the crowd please hold up their cellphones?

The arena lights up.

ANNOUNCER (CONT’D)

(shouting) I think there is only one way to solve this. A real fight.

KATIE

You want us to box?

ANNOUNCER

(shouting) No, I want you to...dance! A good old-fashioned dance-off.

CRISSY

Do you think you can do this?

BEN

Yeah, how are you going to compete, Katie? Can you pull out some smooth moves really quickly?

KATIE

Just step back and watch. I accept the challenge.

FAYE

All right, announcer, man. Drop us some tunes.

They have a dance-off.

ANNOUNCER

(shouting) What do you think audience?

Audience cheers equally for both.

ANNOUNCER (CONT’D)

All right, then I have no choice but to declare a tie. The new world dance champions, Katie and Faye!

The crowd cheers and everyone dances. Blackout. End of play.